Bella Thorne it is famous for having been the girl Disney at the time of 2010, performing a dancer and singer teenager in the series Shake It Up that coprotagonizaba next to the successful actress Zendaya. Now, after many turns of the script in your life, it is a aware of feminist activist and rights LGTBIQ+ that has started in the world of porn as a director with his film “Her & Him”.
The actress, singer and dj in his desire to touch all the sticks art has written a book entitled Autumn Fallsaimed at a teenage audience and includes some personal anecdotes but it is not an autobiography. In addition to be opened in his novel, tends to be very sincere with their followers on social networks, through their publications and, above all, by using the tool “stories” of Instagram, Thorne is left to see without filters, in all senses, and realize how it deals with what happens in your life, and the feelings that it generated certain situations.
Since several years ago, Bella Thorne shares in their networks post certainly controversial, usually appearing party, naked or in positions sensual. A behavior that carry out many young people today, but the case of this actress is different, since, as revealed in 2018, his “obsession with sex” is because she was raped repeatedly when I was a girl.
“Abused me sexually, and psychologically from that I remember until I was 14… when I finally had the courage to close my door at night and sit down to wait. The whole damn night. Waiting for someone to take advantage of me again. Time and time again I waited to stop it and I finally did. Again and again I waited for him to stop and finally he did. But some of us are not so lucky to get out alive. Please, resist for every soul that is abused,” he wrote in his profile.
Despite this, you try to live your sexual condition of pansexual in as healthy a way possible and has had multiple romantic partners, on monogamy and also poly-amorous. However, after the news became public that he has taken the step into porn (as director), has wanted to explain to his 21 million followers with their fears and insecurities, which lead him to give so much importance to the sex.
In the last three post of your account of Instagram, we can see a Bella Thorne half naked, lying on the bed, in an atmosphere of intimacy, in which he has written two poems, and such justification.
“What is my problem? Why do I always need the Validation of everyone, but mainly of men?” questioned the young man. “They all insist on telling me that you’re single, you’re single, and that makes me happy myself. But all of those things to me, they sound fucking terrifying” confesses.
Referring to a man who intuits that she is in love, your partner Benjamin Mascoloadds “all we want is to him. I want to hug you, I want you to love me, I want you to tell me that all is well. I want you to look at me in the eyes and let me know who accepts me as I am”.
Thorne is dismounted in front of the whole world and ask why they may not be accepted, and it alone, to herself: “For some reason, in my head I never good enough for him or for her, nor for anyone else.” In addition, it ensures that “if there is he” only knows to look for who will be the next or the next.
But the reality is that it really seems to yearn for is sought to herself, and accept herself as she is. Before this reflection arises if the sexual abuse suffered when she was a child scarred his whole journey sentimental and sexual the rest of his life: “Is it because I was fastidiada all my life? Exposed to sex at such a young age, perhaps this is all I know to offer to the world… or is it because I was raised to think that was not good enough”.
Next, understand that you may not “to blame your child or anyone for anything” and that “what matters is what is happening to me at this time.” However, you still blaming yourself for not loving yourself as is, not to look attractive and to convey their insecurities to everyone around her. Thorne explains that she is still hoping that people want enough to start to love it the same way “but at the end of the day, that will never happen. Because the only way to reach the final goal is to overcome it,” he says, referring to their insecurities.
Assume also, in this statement that “you have to do damage in this world. To hurt, to love and accept. That is what builds our emotional world”. But he feels heartbroken at the thought of those three things has only one: pain. And not a pain that you have caused other people, but that is what is causing herself “by not loving me and not accepting me”.
To finish, he explains to his fans that she “does not have an end” and that is still descubriéndolo “as always”, leaving in the air the following question “what, Then, is good to know what your end goal but have no idea of how to achieve that? Probably not, but I can only start to accept it” ends.
What is wrong with me? Why do I always need Validation from everyone but mostly men… Everyone keeps telling me to be single, be alone, and make your self happy. But All those things sound so fucking scary to me. all I want is him. I want him to hold me, I want him to love me, I want him to tell me it’s ok, I want him to look me in the eyes and let me know I’m accepted. Why? Because I can’t accept myself. For some reason in my head I’m just not fucking good enough. Not good enough for him or Her or anyone else. And if it’s not him I just look for the “next” him, or her, Why can’t I just look for the next me? Find me and accept me. Was it because I was molested my whole life. Exposed to sex at such a young age it’s all I know how to offer to the world…or is it because I was raised to think I wasn’t good enough. Not good enough for her or anything else. But it doesn’t matter what happened to me.. What matters is whats happening to me right now. I can’t blame my childhood, in fact I can’t blame anyone for anything. All I can do is blame me. I blame me for not loving myself. I blame me for not thinking I’m attractive, I blame me for putting this on everyone around me. Expecting people to love me enough for me to love myself. But at the end of the day that will never happen. Because the only way to get to your end goal is to work through it. Not around or above or try and find a cheat code so you don’t have to hurt as much. You have to hurt in this world. Hurting, loving, and accepting. That’s what our emotional world lays on. Right now I only have one of those things. Can you guess what it is? Hurting. Right now I only hurt…but I’m not hurting for other people don’t I’m only hurting myself. By not loving me and by not accepting me. Usually these free handed writing bit..they have an end, but I don’t have an end. I’m still figuring it out as always. So is that ok? Is it ok to know what your end goal Is but absolutely no way or idea how to achieve it. It’s probably not but I can only start by accepting it. This poem is about mommy and daddy and me and you ❤️ #thelifeofawannabemogul