‘I was submitted to a sexist postgraduate course’

Luciano Huck was the first in the family to learn that his brother, 40-year-old filmmaker Fernando Grostein, is gay. The news, told by himself in 1999, left the presenter, then 28 years old, in “shock”. This episode is narrated in detail in the recently released book “From Door to Door”, which Huck wrote during the pandemic. “‘I’m gay,’ said my only brother, Fernando, on the tin”, begins the presenter, in an entire chapter dedicated to the subject.

“When Fernando, at age 20, marked his position and said, ‘look, I’m gay’, this is my life, this is not a choice, this is my being, this is how I am’, I said: ‘ok ‘. But, at first, I had a bit of a shock – for reasons that have to do with the dull, stupid and almost inhuman way in which the world dictates the rules of behavior, but also because you want the life of the person you love to be a paved road, with no potholes and little winding. (…) In the world we live in, (…) although this is changing, being gay still unfortunately means facing a heavy dose of prejudice”, admits the new host of “Doming√£o” in the book.

In the emotional account full of life lessons, Luciano opens his heart and even admits that he had prejudices.

“The ‘liberation’ started on that day when Fernando showed me that we were neither as similar nor as close as I imagined. (…) Today, I see how many years and years I was subjected to a kind of post -sexist graduation – which devastated and devastates my generation and many others – made me incapable of seeing the prejudices I thought, said and did, and, even worse, the important things I stopped thinking, saying and doing. (…) Today I know that I was also afraid to face my own prejudices”.

Luciano Huck’s mother recounts reaction after filmmaker’s son turns out to be gay: ‘I cried and felt scared’

“Stupidly, I felt that I had a certain obligation to reproduce with him the toxicities I had absorbed in the name of virility, of an abject ‘tradition’ that generated multitudes of traumatized and, at the very least, sexually confused men. (… ) Given the load of sexist and homophobic references that Brazilian society had given me – and the prejudice and suffering that I imagined it would bring to Fernando and my family – my first feeling was, in fact, that of losing ground . There begins a clash between everything that had ingrained in me, the result of what is now called structural machismo, and my attempt to understand and process new information and form a new consciousness,” he explains.

Still in the book, the brother narrates the moment he made the revelation: “Luciano lost ground, but his immediate instinct was to welcome. Protection. I remember that the first thing he did was to give me his hand, hug me and say that we were together. I was looking for acceptance.”

Luciano Huck goes on to explain that he has always had a relationship of affection, love and mutual admiration with Fernando, and tells how proud he is of his brother and how much the filmmaker, who is ten years younger than him, helped him to understand the LGBTTQIA+ universe.

“It was not a few times that my brother and I revisited our pains and emotions on this topic. Lots of conversations, some discussions. (…) Reaching this point of learning was not easy. (…) There were years of meetings and disagreements, some fights and explosive reactions from both sides. I think it’s important to reiterate this, to make it clear that our family life is far from being a script for a margarine commercial. (…) That’s why I expose here, without fear, the bowels of our family intimacy (…). Because I believe that this story contributes, in some way, to make this world better”.

Luciano Huck wrote the book 'De Door to Door' in the pandemic
Luciano Huck wrote the book ‘De Door to Door’ in the pandemic Photo: Disclosure