Patricia Gutiérrez, clinical psychologist: “Values ​​are the basis of children’s well-being, inner security and emotional stability” | Family Mommy and Daddy

Thanks to working for more than 25 years in social and health interventions and being emotionally connected with both families and minors, Barcelona-born Patricia Gutiérrez Albaladze (Granolars, 43 years old) knows that the main sources of protection for individuals As to how important values ​​are. …a knowledge that led this clinical psychologist to create, two years ago, an ambitious project called Familiando, whose objective is, precisely, the identification and creation of value systems…

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Thanks to working for more than 25 years in social and health interventions and being emotionally connected with both families and minors, Barcelona-born Patricia Gutiérrez Albaladze (Granolars, 43 years old) knows that the main sources of protection for individuals As to how important values ​​are. … A knowledge that led this clinical psychologist to create two years ago an ambitious project called Familiando, whose objective, in fact, is the identification and creation of value systems such as empathy, education or generosity.

But equipment is required to implement this project. That is why she is also a professor at the Autonomous University of Madrid and founder of the TAP Center. Advanced Psychological Treatment devoted two years to writing Discover (your) values. Practical guide to education and security (Octahedron, 2023). It is a practical illustrated book which is, in the words of its author, “a plea for prevention, promotion of well-being, identity formation, and development of internal security for adults and children.”

Ask. What are the prices?

Answer. Values ​​are the principles or qualities that characterize and define us as people and, therefore, determine both our present and future actions. They are guides and means to achieve everything we propose. They come from reflection, meditation and listening, from the internal dialogue that we acquire during our development and from the maturation process that we experience as people at different stages and life cycles. Values ​​organize our world in a safe and stable way, they play a fundamental role in the stabilization of our world, in the formation of our roles and even in the evaluation we make about ourselves (self-esteem).

Why. Why is it important to teach values?

R. As mothers and fathers we always consider how to protect, how to accompany our sons and daughters in their development, how to provide them with resources so that they can cope with the demands that they will face.. .Values ​​are great resources, the cornerstone of our children’s safety. It is the basis for creating well-being, inner security and emotional stability. They are an inseparable part of the belief system, the way they will determine our children’s behavior and decision making in their daily lives. They will be present in all their vital stages and maturation processes, helping them to express their interests, desires and needs, in turn, becoming a driving force in the development and management of their emotions. Placing such a significant weight on the well-being and mental health of minors, educating them in the identification, choice and formation of value systems that will define them as people is vital to guarantee their care and protection.

Why, How is one taught values?

R. Teaching with an eye on values ​​is relatively simple. Perhaps the most important thing is to know the values ​​that define us as emotional reference figures. All people, all fathers and mothers, have values, even if we do not identify with them and have made a conscious choice about them. The first thing is to identify our individual value system in order to generate conscious choices towards the family value system; We cannot forget that we are active role models for our sons and daughters. In this way, we can support our children in their development in a simple way.

Why. Are all values ​​equally important when it comes to education?

R. All values ​​are equally relevant. Each of them helps us define ourselves as people. This is one of the keys to it, since we have the opportunity to choose how we want to be, and to consciously make this choice to provide protection and predictive support to our children, knowing that everyone is a protectionist. It is important to use. Children and adults need predictability in our developmental contexts; And it is these values ​​that provide us with the ability to make predictions.

Why. Are they earned or are you born with them?

R. Values ​​are inherent in the human condition, because from the moment we are born we are immersed in a specific society. Also, societies are under the direct influence of a culture, although sometimes we families do not make it explicit, but it is always inherent in us and, therefore, we transmit values ​​from generation to generation. In different cultures we share codes, symbols, norms, traditions, artistic expressions, beliefs, values… The way we express, develop and teach our children will determine their individual and collective culture . Families are immersed in a culture and this will draw on our children’s individual and shared value systems. On the other hand, we know that values ​​are under constant construction, so we can modify and model them, no matter what culture we belong to.

Why. Is it possible to choose values ​​to educate your children?

R. Of course we have the ability to be the first to choose the values ​​that will define us as a family. Actually, this is part of our responsibility. We have to provide them with security, stability, limits and protection so that they can develop healthy, stable and safely, so we have to first define what will be their most protective system. As minors grow up and have the maturity capacity to participate in their own personal definition, it is important to invite them to actively participate in choosing their personal value system. But there are also intra-family value systems to facilitate their active participation, which will result in their self-care, their self-esteem, their inner security and a sense of connectedness with the rest of the family members.

Some practical keys to increasing values

  • Analyze where our values ​​come from and verify if they represent us in the present moment.
  • Check if the values ​​present in our system satisfy us.
  • Make a conscious choice of personal value system and be open to the rest of the family about the values ​​that represent us.
  • Train values ​​with concrete tasks where the choice of values ​​is verified as a family.
  • Review the chosen price systems so that they can be adjusted to actual needs. It is not about working with ideals, but with realities.
  • Follow them as they are already part of the security system. Check periodically (every few months) to ensure they continue to protect the family. If not, it is possible to redo the election. The value system is alive, always adjusted according to needs.

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