Waldinger, Harvard happiness expert: “To be happy you have to have two people you’ll call at midnight”

Robert Waldinger is American psychiatrist, professor Harvard and is the fourth director of The largest study on human happiness It has been implemented and dates back to at least 1938. Data from people who were followed and studied for eight decades revealed that Social and face-to-face component (Technology does not replace it) it is fundamental For the happiness of humans.

Because Impact on health and business successOf course, but nothing is that important To achieve a long, full and satisfied life How are personal relationships?, As Waldinger herself points out in a very interesting talk from BBVA’s ‘We Learn Together’ series, we should all have at least two people we can call in the middle of the night if we’re not feeling well or is there any problem.

Who you call at midnight tells a lot about your life, according to Harvard professor Wallinger

when this happens to us something stressful Our body remains on alert and it boils“It’s a normal response, but our bodies are supposed to do it,” says Wallinger. once back to equilibrium Tension, and this is usually achieved by sharing it. When I get home and talk to my wife about it, I’m calm again.”

Psychiatrist and Harvard professor Robert Waldinger is one of the most expert researchers on the topic of happiness and author of the book ‘A Good Life’.

However, lonely people And separately, according to this study, never returns to the starting point, They are always in a state of conflict, which affects their high levels of stress hormones. Being lonely is not the same as being an introvert, which is a character issue. Introverts don’t have a problem with themselves, they also “know how to fuel themselves better and recharge themselves. Extroverts constantly need reassurance from other people.” But, still, everyone, of course We all need at least some attachment figures.Waldinger says.

Those responsible for the study defend it You need at least two secure relationships “Someone you can call and someone who can be there for you when you need it.”, During the study we asked them to list people they would call in the middle of the night if they were sick or scared. Almost everyone had their list, but There were some who could not target anyone., There were some married people also. “That’s an act.”

There are usually few people in the circle of shy people, but they do exist. What happens is that they become overwhelmed by having too many people. “The other people I’m talking about who are probably going to have health or mental problems are the ones who don’t have them, they don’t look for them or they don’t like them.” But it’s important to force ourselves to do so, because having strong and close relationships with other people not only makes us happier, but also keeps us healthy and Lonely people are more at risk of getting sick All types, from type 2 diabetes to arthritis…” says Professor Wallinger.

The teacher is clear that regardless of character, you can always, absolutely always enrich the circle of friends, Wallinger recommends signing up for any activity or learning you’re passionate about, as it will be much easier to find points of connection with others that way.

You have to establish routines with friends, says Harvard happiness guru

When we are young we believe that friends exist and will always be there, we take it for granted, but as the years go by we understand that friendships must be taken care of. Waldinger assures that this is why it is wonderful to establish routines for behavior with your close friends, your children or your partner. “In relationships that are taken for granted, such as the relationship of a spouse or partner, it is very helpful to have these fixed points so that the relationship does not deteriorate.”


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