This man talked to 5,000 women on Tinder using ChatGPT and met his wife

tinder Finding love can be a tough place, especially without an AI assistant.

When Alexander Zhdan ended his last relationship in 2021, he started looking for a girlfriend in Moscow the old-fashioned way: by swiping through Tinder. They spent hours liking, messaging, and going on dates, but nothing went anywhere. So you decided to program OpenAI’s GPT-2 as your dating assistant. His show saw him chat with 5,239 women on Tinder, set up over 100 dates and eventually find his wife.

“I really understand that dating apps can be difficult and embarrassing,” Zadan told Gizmodo. After learning about ChatGPT, they decided to use it to help break the ice.

The program sounded like them, understood their interests, and could even schedule personal appointments through their Google Calendar. Zadan trained his program to send likes to women who matched his preferences. He also leaked pictures of alcohol and zodiac signs in his biographies, among other details, which are not attractive to him.

In the first version, messages could be sent and conversations could be had, but there were problems in the beginning. In one case, ChatGPT asked a woman to “go for a long walk in the woods” in the first few messages. In another, ChatGPT schedules Zadan on a date and promises him that he will bring chocolates and flowers. When Zadan arrived empty-handed, unaware of the promise made by his digital assistant, he became angry. As OpenAI released GPT-3, 3.5 and 4, he gradually updated his project and gradually became a more thoughtful lover.

Reduce 5,000 women to one

Zhadan’s dating assistant narrowed the 5,000 options down to just one woman, Karina Vylashkaeva. The pair are due in December 2022, and Vylashkaeva says she was talking to ChatGPT during the first months of the relationship.

After a few personal meetings with Vyalashkaeva, Zhdan stopped chatting with other women on Tinder on ChatGPT. The relationship took place offline and the couple moved in together shortly after in 2023.

Zadan last updated his program to become your personal dating guru. Over time, ChatGPT talked less and less with Vylashkaeva and Zhdan. Be the main person speaking. The program already understood all of Zadan’s dating preferences and shortcomings, so it was a useful tool for him to become a better partner.

“At some point, the project wrote me a recommendation that maybe it’s time to propose to Karina,” Zhadan said.

At first they thought his AI project was a hallucination (he never said he wanted to get married), but then they understood.

He said, “Kareena said she wanted to go to a wedding, but Chatgpt thought she would attend his wedding.” Council and he said yes.

Vylashkaeva found out about the project after a few months of dating. When she found out her fiancé was using ChatGPT to talk to her, she wasn’t angry, just surprised. She says initial conversations on Tinder are primarily about learning about interests, hopes, and maybe philosophies. Her future husband’s chatbot did a perfectly good job of communicating this from the beginning.

“He spent a lot of time personalizing these signals, so for me it’s OK when they are used rationally,” Vyalashkaeva said in an interview, noting that when Zhadan was busy her assistant was especially Was useful. “I think the most important thing is our real-life relationship, which is great.”

Romance can never be the same

Zadan does not offer this product to others at this time, mainly because it is too expensive to run: he has spent thousands of dollars on the program. However, his fiancée says AI dating assistants could be a great tool for others, as long as people are honest about who they are. Search .

“I think you really need to understand your goals,” Vylashkaeva said. “Alexander wanted to find a girlfriend and he programmed ChatGPT with very personal information. If ChatGPT and your real-life speech say different things, there will be problems.

Writing pick-up lines on dating apps can be extremely difficult and sometimes extremely embarrassing. Using ChatGPT for Tinder and Hinge is becoming more and more popular; OpenAI’s GPT store is flooded Simple version of Zadaan chatbot, But is a relationship any less meaningful or less real if it’s built with ChatGPT?

Damona Hoffman said, “I am in favor of streamlining the dating process and shortening the time between matching and meeting in person.” , certified dating coach and author of a new book on realistic dating expectations f fairy tale, in an interview.

“If you can program a tool to act as your dating assistant and get you to a real human connection faster, it feels more authentic than trying to figure out who someone is,” Hoffman said. Who’s in the endless text thread.”

Despite the vote of confidence, Tinder may be in trouble. Dating apps don’t necessarily want AI chatbots posing as humans on their platforms, however, as the company doesn’t explicitly rule them out.

A Tinder spokesperson directed Gizmodo to the group’s matches.AI theory“, which states that the company is “developing features that enhance the authenticity of personal expression and human connections.” Match Group does not explicitly ban AI programs, although Zadan has sought to shut down other Tinder chats. The app was disabled in Russia soon after.

At first glance, using ChatGPT to meet your spouse may seem cold and informal. However, Zhdan and Vyalashkaeva formed a warm and loving relationship through AI, and there is no certainty that they would have met without her. Vylashkaeva said the couple will use ChatGPT to help plan the wedding.